Coping with unavoidable pressure

Many mindfulness gurus out there tell us to remove ourselves from stressful situations, to help preserve our own inner peace. But sometimes there is no option available to just walk away from that stressor. I speak from my own experience, as this year I’m not only getting married in the Autumn, but we're also moving house next month and I start a new job within the same week. Although, I have taken many steps to reduce stress-inducing factors, inevitably the pressure has been unavoidable. 

So, in this post I’d like to talk about how we can still be mindful – even if it’s not anywhere near as much as we’d like to be – when we’re in situations that we cannot just walk away from. 

Talk.
The first step I have taken towards looking after my mental health this year is to talk about how I’m feeling with everyone that I am close to. Whether it’s to chat through their experiences, gain some advice or simply to let me air my feelings – this has been crucial to help me gain perspective and, it’s very cathartic! Although my family live 400 miles away, I’ll FaceTime my Mum at every step to gain a new perspective and to talk some rubbish to take my mind off it. Be honest with your peers about what you’re going through, and you’ll usually find that they sympathise with your experience having been through it themselves. 

Rest.
The bare minimum requirement you should set yourself during times of strain is to get enough rest. Although, in a cruel twist of irony we usually cannot rest easily, take moments to just lie down and close your eyes or even a small 5 minutes of fresh air will help. Since practicing mindfulness, I have become far more intuitive to my mind and body, and usually can identify the early signs that I am overwhelmed and must pull the brakes for a moment. My partner is also very aware of my sensitivity to stressors and will pick up on the warning signs. Document your feelings in a journal, have a non-negotiable lunch time walk to check in with yourself or just set your intentions to be aware. 

Observe.
Think before you respond. Strangely this technique was taught to me by my partner as it was something he was taught to implement during his time in the military. I’m talking about what is known as a “Condor moment”. It’s named after the old Condor tobacco adverts where the someone who is smoking a pipe of the product calmly removes any distractions from his moment so that he can think clearly. Also recommended by Limitless author and astronaut Tim Peake, the reason this technique is so popular is because it’s encouraging individuals to take a step away from stimuli to reflect. This is harder to do than you think when you’re caught up in emotions and pressure, but it really has been pivotal to making the right decisions in tough situations. Get in the habit of having a “Condor moment” before you do anything. 

None of these tips are ground-breaking, but I have found reminding myself of each one of these elements to mindfulness has been really effective in supporting my mental health. When there’s a lot going on, it can be hard to remember how simple mindfulness is and how effective it can be. So remember to talk, rest and observe.